Everyone seems to have a blog or work for a blog these days. But fashion bloggers are a very specific lot, and if you are looking at getting into a relationship with someone who has a blog and updates it more than once a week, there are some things to keep in mind.
We caught up with Loveawake founder and online dating expert, Alex Wise, who offered up some insider things you should know before dating a fashion blogger:
1. Photography skills are more valuable than a trust fund and six foreign languages.
Dating sites go to a lot of trouble to help people take good, attractive profile photos, but when I look at them I often think, “That person has a really good sense about lighting and an interesting approach to angles!” almost as much as I think, “That person is hot!” Sure, a blogger can get good photos done with a tripod or a selfie stick, but if you have a passion for photography, that’s definitely a bonus.
2. Don’t make any plans for 10 a.m. or 3 p.m.
At 10 a.m. and 3 p.m., the light is perfect for taking very flattering photos in natural light. This is an ideal time to run outdoors for a quick photoshoot, so you probably should not make any plans that do not involve taking photos. After dark, you can do whatever you want.
3. Do not diss the blog, or the clothes.
“When are you going to get a real job?” is a nasty thing to say to a person in basically any field, but a lot of people think it’s OK to say to bloggers. If blogging results in the payment of taxes and rent, it is a real job. And you don’t have to be interested in fashion, but dismissing it out of hand is rude. “I hope if we have a daughter, she is not at all interested in fashion or beauty or shoes,” is downright insulting, whether the blog is a full-time job or a hobby.
4. Laundry is not a mindless chore.
Doing your own laundry is essential. Doing your partner’s laundry is a very nice gesture, but not if you’re going to throw everything you see in on “hot” and leave it to dry for 16 hours. Doing laundry properly keeps clothes looking nice and lasting for a long time, which is extremely important if the clothes are fancy and expensive. If you’re going to do the laundry, please read all instructions, and maybe look up how to do laundry like a grown-up before trying. If you can’t be bothered to not throw cashmere sweaters from the Rick Owens sample sale in with the dirty jeans and gym clothes, just take care of your own laundry and leave the weird stuff to the professionals.
5. You can wear whatever you want.
If you are also interested in fashion, that is fantastic. Shared interests keep a relationship alive and make great blog content. But if you intend on only wearing giant jeans and sweatshirts you can sleep in, that’s fine too. You aren’t going to be changed or styled, unless that’s what you want
6. Dinner time is 10 a.m.
If the blogger of your heart is a lifestyle blogger, you should be prepared to either eat coq au vin for breakfast. Normal people like to eat dinner at a sane time of 7 or 8 p.m., but it’s virtually impossible to take a good picture then. Your food photography will look best around 10 a.m., so that’s when the roast will be finished and photographed. Afterwards, it makes a very nice breakfast.
7. Stay away from the scissors.
This does not apply to all fashion bloggers, but if you are dating one who makes clothes, or a person who sews at all, do not touch his or her scissors. Seriously. If the house is burning down and the only way to escape to freedom is to use the scissors, you’re just going to have to accept the frailty of your human existence. Though there is probably one pair of scissors in the house you can use for things like cutting string or paper or hair or your toenails, so ask which pair that is and then never ever touch another pair of scissors as long as you live.
8. Be prepared to be all alone during Fashion Week.
During Fashion Week, you might as well be dating a ghost. If not for the smell of dry shampoo and all the makeup lying around the sink, you might think you were single. Just leave a pair of sweatpants and warm socks on the couch next to you, and once the shows are over your significant other will fill them up and do nothing but watch Netflix and drink couch wine for a week.
9. Be prepared to read about yourself.
Bloggers are writers, and when dating any writer one must be prepared to see oneself in print. If you have a problem with that, try to establish boundaries early. Otherwise, it is totally fair game for her to write about that time you threw her favorite Rick Owens sweater in the dryer and shrank it to doll-size.
10. Gifts are hard.
Shopping for someone with very specific, esoteric tastes is very, very difficult. You’re probably never going to find the perfect shirt or dress or shoes, but alcohol and flowers are always a good idea. (You can skip the flowers.)
11. You’ll get so much free alcohol.
If you’re willing to get a little bit dressed up, you can probably go along to all the cool events bloggers get invited to. Alcohol brands throw lots of parties, so be ready to drink your weight in Campari.